Thursday, March 1, 2018 at 11:07AM
UUCVH

April 2018

Dear Friends,

 

"We are afraid to care too much, for fear that the other person does not care at all."

This quote from Eleanor Roosevelt was, when I first read it, a decades-old splash of cold water. On its face it says so much about the things that thwart our natural tendencies toward doing good — that our efforts won't be appreciated. 

But it also countenances so many daily inequalities in our lives which may or may not have different contemporary names, from donor fatigue to atychiphobia (Fear of Failure: Why try at all if my goals are unreachable?) to co-dependence.

In the world of personal news platforms and social commentary, we might put too much spin on our caring because we are prepared either for apathy or for a negative, knee-jerk reaction. The backlash against the impressive and fierce Parkland students comes to mind as an example of our culture's destructive antipathy toward simply showing we care, even if our opinions are different. 

In our UU community setting, that quote has a bearing on our occasional rifts that arise among a group of spirited, educated people, each of whom enjoys the simple pleasure of knowing they're right.

We are losing our minister in a few months, and my predecessor in this position also resigned. Two good, able, educated, spirited people. My goal in this gig, the goal of the Board, and the goal of you, the congregation of UUVerdugo is to recommit ourselves to Right Relations with each other, to throw open our doors, to draw seekers to us, and to seek people out. It is very simply the means of our survival. 

Today, ask yourself: Are these differences of opinion insurmountable? Is there a bridge I can build? What is my fear of not being agreed with?

Like that guy Eleanor was married to said, "We have nothing to fear but fear itself." And we certainly should not be fearful of caring too much. I personally will not point and laugh at you if I see you caring too much. 

Marty Barrett, Board President

 

 

Article originally appeared on Unitarian Universalist Church of the Verdugo Hills, La Crescenta, CA (http://www.uuverdugo.org/).
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